How do you envision yourself in the future? What do you want to do with your life? What career awaits you? What goals do you want to accomplish? What adventures do you want to undertake? What challenges do you want to face?
These questions are important not only for self motivation, but also for considering where a dating partner will fit into your plans.
Do you imagine a partner who will share your dreams? Or do you imagine someone with dreams.
Strange though it may sound, self-awareness is perhaps your most valuable attribute when it comes to dating. After all, if you don’t know who you are, how can you decide who or what is best for you in a relationship? To help you figure out who you are, we’ve put together some questions for you to answer.
If you have a good sense of humor, people will take notice. Looks fade and bodies sag, but a sense of humor is attractive throughout life. We’re talking about being a stand-up comic or having a joke or sarcastic comment ready for every occasion. We’re not even necessarily talking about being funny. We’re talking about recognizing and enjoying humor when you see or hear it. We’re talking about having a ready smile when you hear a witty comment whispered under someone’s breath during class. We’re talking about having a broad enough understanding of American culture to recognize parody when you see it but most of all; we’re talking about making people comfortable with your laugh.
“Magnetism” here refers to the characteristics and qualities that other people find attractive. What attributes of yours do people comment on most often? Do you have an engaging personality, an infectious laugh, an ability to make others feel comfortable? How freely do you allow yourself to express those things? Is there something in your life that is prohibiting you from setting your natural attributes loose on the world? If so, address the stumbling block. Ask the lord to help you recognize your “attractive” features and feel comfortable enough with them to share them with others.
We are not talking about trying to be something you’re not. You’re not naturally dynamic, don’t try to be. Just make sure you let the good things inside you shine out.
Do you know what kind of an attitude you project to other people? You can get a pretty good sense just by watching those around you. Do they seem reluctant to approach you? Do they seem uncomfortable around you? If so, you may be unknowingly thwarting opportunities to meet new people-including those of the opposite sex.
If you’re unsure about the signals you’re sending to other people, ask your friends for some feedback. Find out what their initial impressions of you were. Did you seem snobby to them? Was there something about you that said, “don’t bother approaching me-I’m not interested”? What did they think? Encourage your friends to be honest and not to worry about paring your feelings.
You’ve probably me people who were nothing like they first seemed to you. Could it be that you’re that type of person? If so, you’re probably going to want o correct people’s misconceptions. If you’ve got an unapproachable exterior, the best way to let people know what you’re really like is to approach the warm, carrying, funny, and them. Show them the warm, caring, funny, approachable person beneath the façade.
Entering the dating world is a bit like going back to your old grade school playground. Suddenly the fear of being the last person selected when choosing up sides becomes very real to you again. It’s a fear most everyone has experienced at one time or another:”what if no one picks me in the dating game?”
Also, we don’t make the rules of the game, so there’s nothing we can do about the “choosy” nature of dating. What we can do is offer you some suggestions as to how you might enhance your dating and position yourself as a more obvious choice.
A good friend is someone calls you every time. The breakfast club is on TV because she knows you’re your favorite movie. A good fiend s someone who embarrasses you by making a big deal of your birthday, even when you tried to pretended you a tape of your favorite songs just because she felts like doing it. A good friend is someone who listens for the giant’s score every night, even though he hates sports, because he knows you’re a big fan. A good friend is someone who is interested in things for n other reason than the fact that you’re interested in them. A good friend celebrates you and the things you love.
A good friend actually believes that “friends are forever”. A good friend’s loyalty is unwavering. A good friend recognizes and accepts your flaws ad weakness. A good friend recognizes and accepts your flaws and weakness. A good friend may be hurt by you, but will come to you with that hurt. A good friend will accept your heartfelt apology without holding a grudge. A good friend will not allow your friendship to be jeopardized by trivial matters.
A good friend will listen to everything you have to any, but will not automatically agree with you. A good friend cares enough about you and is confident enough in your friendship o give you of line, point out when you’re being selfish, and confront you when you’ve being selfish, and confront you when you’ve been hurtful. Most importantly, though, a good friend will do all of these things in a loving and compassionate way, as prescribed by the apostle Paul in Ephesians 4:15.
A good friend will keep all of your secrets, except the ones that could hurt you. A good friend has no interest in gossiping to others about the things you share. a good friend will not use your words against you under any circumstances when you open up to a good friend, you can be confident that no one else will ever hear what you say.
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